Disasters Emergency Committee

The Cost of Christmas

According to today's Independent Britain spent more on cosmetics this Christmas (£4.2 billion) than the UK's annual third world aid budget (£4.14 billion).

There's not a lot I can say about that.

Music

I mentioned a while back that I write music (that should be in inverted commas I think!) and since then I've had, ooh, two requests to hear some of it. So...

Apart from 'Flying' these are AAC files (m4a) so you need to have the latest Quicktime installed or iTunes.

Bear in mind I'm a self-taught 'composer' so be kind with your criticism :-) They're not really intended for public consumption

Two Piers
These are two pieces named after Brighton's two piers. The Palace Pier is still open and is covered in amusement arcades and fairground rides, hence the piece is quite lively and repetitive. It needs a lot of work, in particular a few key changes. I like the little fugue-ish thing about three or four minutes in and the last two minutes or so when the mood changes completely.

The West Pier was closed in the mid 1970s but not until it had starred in a couple of films: Brighton Rock and Oh! What A Lovely War! Just after I moved to Brighton it blew down in a storm and then last year burnt down as well. A real shame as it was a beautiful building. There are still plans to restore it. You can see pictures of the storm damage and the fire in progress on my site.

The West Pier movement started life as a Kyrie, which is the first part of a choral mass - I'd planned to put it forward for a choir I sang in but was too shy to let people know I'd written something, so never did.

Both pieces were written in the mid to late 1990s and I've been working on them on and off ever since, usually a few tweaks here and there. I'm getting a bit bored with them now.
Palace Pier is arranged for string quartet, but the computer sythesised sounds are slightly grating.
I've arranged West Pier for wind quintet and quite like the sound.

Click these links to hear:

Palace Pier
West Pier

Bits and bobs

A Minute Of Your Time
Just a bit of silliness. This piece actually lasts slightly more than a minute, because when someone says they want a minute of your time, it always over-runs.

Decisions, decisions
Originally written in 1992 I think, inspired by my girlfriend of the time who was practicing a piece by Francis Poulenc called Mouvements Perpetual for a piano recital. I called it Decisions, Decisions last year when a student of mine kept emailing me every few minutes with a new idea for her dissertation subject but would keep returning to the original idea - which is what the piece does. Seemed quite funny at the time.

Flying
I've already posted this. I quite like this but the arrangement is awful. It's based on an overlapping seven-note tune - I think the technical term for this is 'organum' and dates from plainchant in the middle ages, but I could be wrong. Ocer each repetition of the sequence is a different type of melody.

I called it 'Flying' for an ex-girlfriend who moved to the other side of the world (I have that effect). Apparently she got into the habit of listening to it while getting ready in the morning as it lasted just the right length of time. That's what I liked about her - she didn't take hours to get ready ;-)

I wanted to arrange this piece and make it the third movement of 'Two Piers' the idea being that it's supposed to evoke the sound of walking from the West Pier to the Palace Pier on a Saturday night - the different tunes being the equivelant of the different sounds coming from all the clubs on the sea front. Maybe I will one day but I don't think it'll sound right.

Changing minds

I was thinking about the little 'catchphrase' thing I've got at the top of my blog - 'I reserve the right to change my mind at any time'. That wasn't just pretention; partly it was so that nobody in years to come could quote me as believing something I no longer happen to believe but also because I happen to think that it's incumbent on all academics to try to change their own minds before they can hope to change anyone else's.

I know I sometimes say things in a very strident tone but often I'm arguing with myself, playing devil's advocate. I've noticed over the past few years that academia is a far less imaginative place than it should be, and I don't think you could find more closed minds if you tried. If you try to start a hypothetical discussion, or ask someone to consider a radical (or even non-radical) alternative to their own point of view, it often results in a shouting match and ostracising.

I think that's what worries me about the book on Visual Communication I'm writing (chapter 1 finished and off today). I'm outlining some theories that are controversial (apparently one rather well known designer has already taken umbridge) but need to be aired, even if the end result is they're soundly beaten. So long as there's a reasonable debate I don't mind; I change my mind all the time.

One of my first years changed my mind the other week - not deliberately though. During a discussion they said something in opposition to a point I made and it festered with me. It wasn't so much that I found I was wrong and they were right, but it opened up an intriguing middle view. I like it when that happens, it's like things clicking into place - you can almost feel it.

But with publication you're preserving your words for quite some time. To give an example, I referred one of my third years yesterday to a classic text, Subculture by Dick Hebdige. It's about three decades old now but is still in print and is seen as the classic text on the subject.
Problem is, the author later wrote saying he'd changed his mind on a lot of the things he'd said in the original volume. But no one seems to remember that, and his original ideas are still taught even though he himself has doubts about them.
Why they don't bring out a revised edition I'll never know...

More Sustainable Design Discussion [updated]

James, one of my third year students, has launched his own blog and posed some questions on sustainability in graphic design. Head on over and add your thoughts, whichever side of the argument you take.

pausedog

[updated to correct the URL! What a plonker I am...]

Did I Miss Something?

North by Northwest was on TV this afternoon. It's one of those classic films that when you stop and think about it you realise you've never seen. Actually, I think I have seen this many years ago as a child, or more likely I've seen so many spoofs of it and clips that I think I've seen it.

Anyway, I had planned to go to the gym this afternoon to be ritually humiliated by all the people who really don't need to be there, and appalled by the lack of shame by those for whom it is far too late - both groups should be banned from wearing Lycra. It's quite funny the place is called LA Fitness as it counjures up images of tanned and rippling bodies but it's far from coming close (although in comparison to me, maybe that's what everyone looks like).
But I thought what the hell, I haven't vegged in front of a Sunday afternoon movie for years so why not?

It's quite an impressive movie, well-directed (some English bloke I think...) and unexpectedly funny. The sequence where Cary Grant phones his mother had me laughing out loud. Great score too.

The colour palette of the film intrigued me - lots of greys. That got me wondering - was grey a fashionable colour in the US at the time? Or was it so that the few bright colours stood out more (colour films still being quite new)? Or was it so the film looked better in black and white? Or was it simply an art director's choice? Whatever -it was quite stylish. The UN building looked spectacular, particularly the interior matte painting.

With commercials the film lasted two and a half hours, which is some commitment. Unlike a lot of films, my attention didn't wane in the third act. I did get distracted as I tried to figure out who the President next to George Washington was on Mount Rushmore (Jefferson, I just found out).
But then it got to the final chase sequence on the monument, we get to the climax where Grant is calling for the baddie to help him climb up from the edge. It looks like he's going to help but then he just treads on his fingers - and is shot. We cut to a crowd up at the top of the mountain where we hear VanDamme (presumably he's been captured but it's so quick you can't tell) and then Grant leans down and says 'Take my hand' and there's this cut to him and the heroine sitting on a train having been married. The end.

That's it. Possibly the worst ending to a movie I've ever seen and such a disappointment... I can't believe that's how it was supposed to end. Very poor.

Oh well. I'm trying to see a lot of films over the next year. I don't go to the cinema much (no fun on your own) so I'm a bit behind. I caught Goldmember, Hulk and The Core the other weekend thanks to the movie channel I've just subscribed to. All rather bad, I thought. I'd enjoyed the other Austin Powers movies, so was expecting better. Hulk - blimey, what happened there? Couldn't make their mind up whether to be corny or serious, I think. And if I hadn't just claimed North by Northwest to have the worst ending ever, I might give the accolade to Hulk. After all that chasing there's a bang and then we're in south America. Talking of Lycra, where did he get those super-stretchy shorts?
The Core - oh dear. So bad on many many levels, not least of which the physics (so this guy with no research grant has managed to invent a machine that slices through rock like a hot knife through butter and a metal that gets more resistant to heat the more pressure it's under (and he calls it 'unobtanium')? I know this is science fiction but please...
A wuestion kept popping up in my mind. In this movie we see Rome get wiped out, killer pigeons in Londond, San Francisco gets melted (just after surviving attacks by the Green Goblin and The Hulk if I'm not mistaken - what with that and the San Andreas fault I'd suggest it's not the best place to live, people). If memory serves, Paris got flattened in that movie with the asteroid. So what it is with natural disasters just happening to pick famous, densely populated places?

In my attempt to catch up with movies I really should have seen but don't think I have I signed up for Amazon.co.uk's DVD rental service. £7.99 for four DVDs a month and no return dates. It's an attempt to save money as because I'm really bad at returning DVDs to libraries I often buy movies on DVD (it's cheaper, believe me!) Oddly enough, rather than put all the classics on my list I've started with Shrek 2 and Spiderman 2. Well, it's Christmas - I can be worthy in the new year.

Overseas Postings

I have to say I'm quite tempted to work abroad for a bit. I've been thinking about the USA or Canada. (New Zealand and Australia would be favourite but have you seen the size of the spiders they've got down there? There's no newspaper big enough to squash those buggers!)

Canada appeals more than the US I think - just about everyone I know who's been seems to go on and on about it and the other day I caught a TV programme in which two Brits went property hunting and were turning down huge houses with mountain views that cost a pittance compared with what I'm paying in rent for my one bedroom flat (£600 per month in case you were wondering). I wouldn't say no to the USA of course - except I'd worry about health and dental care (contrary to popular myth we Brits do actually have dentists...)

But apart from a job in Savannah that appeared last year (far too hot for my Anglo-Saxon complexion) nothing that's appeared has applied to me because of the USA's employment laws (how is it we're over-run by Americans over here? Not that I mind - just seems a bit unfair ;-)

But today some jobs in Toronto appeared and though I'm not an ideal fit qualifications-wise (no PhD - like I can afford to do one of those, I'm tempted to apply as I think my teaching and publication record is good, and it's easier to emigrate to Canada to teach.

But two or three things stand in the way of jobs in the USA and Canada. The first is the need to see samples of students' work - it's the students' work, not mine so how should that help me get a job? Anyway I teach away from the studio now so it's even less relevant. Minor point, and one I haven't got a problem arguing.

The second is a desire to see examples of my work. I haven't practised for five years so have no portfolio - when I moved in to teaching I moved all the way. Plus as I've said before I happen to think the quality of your design work has no direct relationship to your abilities as a teacher (I mean, my design is mediocre to say the least - god, I hope the same isn't true of my teaching!)

But the third one is the killer and probably says a lot about the difference between the UK and north America: you have to send three letters of reference with your application. Well that's it right there. Can't do, sorry.

In the UK it's traditional to apply for jobs in absolute secrecy and to invent a sick relative so that you have a convenient funeral to go to on the day of the interview. Applying for a job is often seen as disloyal - I remember in my first job I was in a dilemma about whether to accept a post in Liverpool and asked my boss (who I thought I could trust) for some advice. A few weeks later after turning down the other job I had my annual review and was berated for my lack of commitment!

It's a lot different in schools over here - friends of mine who are teachers are quite open about going for other jobs and references are sought before interviews, and replacement teachers brought in to cover the day. There it's accepted as part of a teacher's career development that they will apply for jobs and, occasionally, get them.

But in post-school education while it's freer than industry there's still an element of risk involved. For one thing if you apply for a position that your current employer thinks is too high for you there's a risk they'll see you as overambitious. Secondly if you don't get it there's a risk your current employer will question your judgement and wonder what it is the other people spotted about you that they should be worried about. Thirdly in an age of short term contracts (my teaching contract is termly, my admin contract is renewed annually) there's an added risk that they might just view you as not really committed to the job and let you go, job or no job.
Fourthly, what employer is going to give you a glowing reference while you're still employed by them? It stops them being able to get rid of you later. It's just not done. In this country, references are only provided (and only sought) after the job is offered - you have to suspect anyone who goes to an interview with glowing letters of recommendation ;-)

The fifth reason is a practical one. Given it sometimes takes months just to get paid, what's the likelihood I could coordinate three references to be sent directly to the university by the deadline?

Well I might consider Canada and canvass for references after the Christmas break (I know a couple of ex students who'll write a testimonial - that should help).

But it's cold there, right?
I may not like the heat but I'm not keen on the cold either. Even though Toronto is at a similar latitude as where I used to live, we've got the Gulf Stream to keep us warm - that's why there's no polar bears in the Lake District over here and why, contrary to the Dickensian images you may see of traditional English Christmases, it actually only snows very rarely in the south (although that's probably more to do with global warming than the Gulf Stream - although I'm not sure Mr Bush would agree*).

No, what I need is somewhere more temperate, that doesn't want a PhD, nor to see any of my students' work, or indeed any of mine, and is happy to offer me a job without references.

What are the odds?





* And comments like that, of course, are another reason I'll never get a job in the USA. I bet I'm on some database somewhere...

The Complete Works

BBC Radio 3 is planning to devote an entire week's schedules to broadcasting every piece written by Beethoven.

This is an interesting idea - I first got into classical music through a box set of Beethoven symphonies on LP that I bought with my first student grant in 1987 - £10, quite a bargain (but 1/7 of my grant so maybe not). It was something of a leap of faith; I was of the opinion that as I was about to become an art student I'd better start being arty, so I grew my hair long, taught myself to play guitar and started listening to Beethoven! God I laugh at myself sometimes.

I quickly became engrossed in the third, seventh and ninth symphonies - particularly the second movements of the 3rd and 7th. Reading the accompanying notes I found myself wondering if the people analysing the music weren't missing the point of it and I think that was the starting point of my scepticism of the sort of language which is used when describing art, design, music and so on.
I bought a book to teach myself basic harmony, and a biography of Beethoven and eventually studied for a degree in music and history through the Open University (i.e. part time at home), which included a module on Beethoven. Doing this I began to realise that there was a point to analysis and an objective explanation for why music 'works' - but also that knowing the rules doesn't mean you wil be able to do it. (I think this is what Matthew Mulder was getting at in his response to my design education post from many moons ago). The best proof of this is my own music, some of which I might post here soon - pretty dreadful stuff but not bad for someone who's essentially self-taught!

It's funny how music links so closely to design, and how my growing love of music led me into teaching and to many of my theories on teaching. I might have to think some more about that.

But the 'everything Beethoven wrote' sequence is an interesting idea that I'm in several minds about. I had an argument (too strong a word perhaps) with a student recently because I was highly critical about an exhibition of typography I'd seen at the London College of Communication (formerly the London College of Printing). They had about 200 typographers on the wall with photos, potted biographies and samples of their work. I wondered how those 200 had come to be chosen, what was implied about the people who weren't included, and the fundamental question: so what? They're typographers - big deal. (It was during a discussion on graphic authorship and I was trying to provoke a response). This student said something along the lines of 'it's important to learn who the leading typographers are so you know what typefaces to choose'. I asked if the choice shouldn't be made based on appropriateness to the job at hand, but this student continued that if she knew which typographers were respected she would look up all their typefaces; 'so you'd exclude all the other possibilities?' I asked. I also wondered if she believed that every typeface produced by a 'famous' typographer was bound to be good, and whether she'd be able to form her own opinion or be led by concensus to rank the designer and the typeface.
I can't remember the details of the conversation and I'm not sure I'm putting it across properly but I was in many ways arguing with myself and my own double standards: heaven knows I'd be delighted if I were ever included in a list of the great and the good, and come publication day I'll be standing in Borders pointing to my book saying 'I wrote that!'

But I also applied exactly this student's thinking to my exploration of music and started with Beethoven because I'd received the opinion he was great; and I listened to the fifth symphony because it was famous, then I listened to the rest of the canon of his nine symphonies. The same with Mahler.
I suppose canons give us a starting point, a way into a large field, but they also stifle us and lead us to value things that actually aren't that valuable.

Take for example a story yesterday that Steve Jobs has been given permission to demolish a mansion designed by George Washington Smith despite protests from preservationists. Apparently the building is not a great example of the guy's work and is run down. Should it be preserved or not? What are the criteria? Is it worth it just because it was designed by someone who did better things? Should we only preserve the artistic peaks or celebrate the whole body of works? And why focus on the designer in the first place? If the building's useless as a house shouldn't it be pulled down to make way for a better one? (I speak as a conservationist, by the way - in the UK we're still tearing down our architectural heritage believe it or not).

The Beethoven celebration is openly playing all his works without a pretence that everything is a masterpiece. One spokesperson said that to appreciate the 'hills' you have to hear the 'valleys', and there is much in Beethoven's output which is frankly rubbish.
Personally I think that's a healthy and rare attitude to take because we very often rank people by their highest achievements conveniently forgetting their otherwise average or below-par work. The design canon, like the musical one, is full of 'one hit wonders' and only serves to highlight forgotten genius...

[I'm thinking out loud here so forgive me. I'm actually writing on this subject at the moment for the closing pages of my book and I'm aware that I could contradict myself - actually, I'm happy to do it, to work things out publicly; but because you are only ever judged selectively (as I've said) I could say something in print that I later change my mind about, but forever be quoted as the guy who said the thing I no longer think. If you get what I mean!]

I had a meeting today about illustrations for the book and I originally asked for a 'rogues gallery' of the great and the good to go on one page to illustrate the idea of a canon, and opposite a similar gallery of completely anonymous designers who produce the things we interact with daily - the playbills, the money off vouchers, the store point of sale material, the catalogues. I think they're the real design heroes, and the sort of designers that students are most likely to end up being. But we give them this mythical view of heroism, don't we? It's unreal.

Anyway the idea was squashed, partly because the publisher doesn't want to insult the 'rogues' and also because, ironically, we've interviewed a couple of them for the book! Ha - double standards indeed...

I'd like to mount an exhibition called '10% off' - so called because it would celebrate 'ordinary' graphic design , like your 10% off promotional materials that you see around you, but also because it would ignore the 'top' 10% of designers, the 'heroes', and focus on the rest. Could be the title of my next book and I can apply my own double standards to that as well ;-)

Well that was a rambling post - it was only intended to be a couple of lines long.
For what it's worth, Shostakovitch is my new love - the 5th, 10th and 11th symphonies, the two violin concertos and two cello concertos... to die for.

BBC NEWS | Entertainment | TV and Radio | Radio 3 plans Beethoven marathon: "BBC Radio 3 is clearing the airwaves to make way for the entire works of Beethoven next year.

Listeners will be able to hear everything from his major symphonies to lesser-known folk songs over six consecutive days and nights in June.

For the first time in the network's history, schedules will be entirely devoted to one theme.

Radio 3 controller Roger Wright said: 'Our listeners have huge loyalty, curiosity - and stamina!'"

My First Amazon Moment [updated]

Ooh what an interesting experience. A book I've been contributing to has appeared on Amazon etc.
Sadly, my name appears to have been missed off, although it appears on the WH Smith listing and at Blackwell's Bookshop, so no doubt it'll soon be corrected on Amazon. I hope. I came to the project late so it's not surprising.

Update:
Amazon.co.uk have updated the details and I'm now listed. It's like the thrill you get when the first box of leaflets you designed comes back from the printer...



If you're in the USA you can place an order now (bloody good price compared with the UK - I'm going to have to buy my copies from the US!):


If you are in the UK, use this link to purchase More Than A Name, although I don't think they're actually accepting orders yet.

Mind you, it's not out yet and won't be until June so nearer the time I'll do a proper blurb. My own book should be out about that time too, from the same publisher. Can't wait...

In the meantime, back to the second draft. I'm trying to find a simple way of explaining 'hegemony'... I need a cup of tea.

You Are Here

In The Restaurant At The End of the Universe (what do you mean you haven't read it? Or heard it? Look it up on Amazon right now) Zaphod Beeblebrox is sentenced to be punished by being placed in the 'Total Perspective Vortex' (see quotation below), a room which projects a scale map of the universe with an infintessimally small arrow and the words 'you are here' - the point being it makes you realise how utterly insignificant you are. In the original radio broadcast you hear the blood-curdling screams of the previous occupant before Beeblebrox is marched in...
And then he comes out quite unscathed, to the surprise of his captors. Turns out he was as important as he believed he was after all.

Anyway, I entered a web version of the Total Perspective Vortex today. I took a look at the PubSub LinkRank site and discovered, based on the number of other sites linking to me, that I am ranked 1,039,868 on the web - down (get this) from just 950,000th a month ago.
Check your own ranking out by clicking on the link and replacing the last part of the URL with your own domain. I can see the next few weeks getting a little obsessive...

The Total Perspective Vortex derives its picture of the whole Universe on the principle of extrapolated matter analyses. Since every piece of matter in the Universe is in some way affected by every other piece of matter in the Universe, it is in theory possible to extrapolate the whole of creation – every sun, every planet, their orbits, their composition and their economic and social history from, say, one small piece of fairy cake.

The man who invented the Total Perspective Vortex did so basically in order to annoy his wife.

Trin Tragula – for that was his name – was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher or, as his wife would have it, an idiot. She would nag him incessantly about the utterly inordinate amount of time he spent staring out into space, or mulling over the mechanics of safety pins, or doing spectrographic analyses of pieces of fairy cake.

“Have some sense of proportion!” she would say, sometimes as often as thirty-eight times in a single day.

And so he built the Total Perspective Vortex, just to show her. Into one end he plugged the whole of reality as extrapolated from a piece of fairy cake, and into the other end he plugged his wife: so that when he turned it on she haw in one instant the whole infinity of creation and herself in relation to it.

To Trin Tragula’s horror, the shock completely annihilated her brain; but to his satisfaction he realized that he had proved conclusively that if life is going to exist in a Universe of this size, then the one thing it cannot have is a sense of proportion.

Douglas Adams

UK readers click here to buy from Amazon.co.uk

Student fundraising

According to this BBC News report (requires Real Video) students at a German university have posed naked for a calendar to raise funds to 'save' the university.

Mmm... an interesting moral dilemma for any member of staff. Do you buy it and be accused of letchery, or refuse to buy it and be accused of not supporting the cause? I think I'd just make a donation and walk away.

Fortunately the students I teach have a much more practical way of raising cash - they organise some (apparently quite successful) nightclub events in town. Despite constant invitations I haven't yet gone to one of these - maybe when teaching's finished and I can't be blackmailed with photos of my attempts at dancing.

Talking of naked students (er, that phrase won't look good in the Google searches!) in my first job the annual 'design a poster for the end of year exhibition' competition was won by a third year who photographed apparently naked students with strategically placed portfolios (I'm sure it's been done to death everywhere).
The treatment of the idea was quite amusing and novel - but college management were very nervous and began to tinker so much with the idea that the student involved became completely disillusioned with graphic design, and I very nearly resigned!

Funny how what's unaceptable in one institution hardly raises an eyebrow in others - I've been to a few end of year fashion shows where topless dresses always seem to make an appearance (possibly something to do with saving money on cloth), and my boss tells a very funny story about how a group of government inspectors were visiting the university and having coffee in the cafe when a completely naked and gold student walked past the window, with absolutley nobody taking any notice at all.
Even the inspectors were blasé about it, having quickly got used to 'art and design ways of thinking'.

I remember another group of inspectors were visiting a fashion department once and heard how an increase in student numbers and a decline in space meant it was becoming impossible to make garments anymore.
"You could always specialise in baby clothes" one suggested...

Revitalizing Reason in Design Education

I'm sure Tom Gleason is telepathically tuned in to me. I've just taken a break from the last section of my book in which I'm talking about design education and its 'kidnapping' by the art world (I'll tone it down for publication!) and then I read Tom's post on rationality in design.

On the one hand, it's great because it says exactly what I'm saying and just at the moment I need that reassurance. On the other it's bad because I now have to be careful I don't appear to be plagiarising him. Damn you, Tom! I think this is the third time it's happened...

Any design faculty that is prepared to accept challenging views should have someone like this on their payroll. Trouble is, as I've found, arguing for rationality in design education is the equivelant of stealing the duvet. Before long if you don't roll back over and go to sleep you'll be kicked out of bed altogether. People like to be cosy.

Point . Design: Revitalizing Reason in Design Education: "A true study of design inevitably requires the student to realize and come to terms with the connections between (a) design and rationality and (b) rationality and communication.

The most important first lesson for a designer, the one lesson which initiates him or her as a designer, is this: Every design decision is in principle justifiable. In other words, design is reasonable. The designer has reasons for his or her choice of a typeface, graphic style, means of reproduction, etc. A piece is considered to be highly designed or well-designed when, if asked, the designer is able to argue convincingly for all of his or her design decisions. (continued...)"

How to recognise an ambulance

Beginners' Guide to Ambulance Spotting - not a book I thought might be worth proposing to a publisher before, but apparently there's a market. A lesson for designers everywhere, here: you really can't be too obvious...

BBC NEWS | England | Staffordshire | Toll motorway holds up ambulance: An emergency vehicle was delayed from responding to a 999 call when its paramedic driver was told to pay for using the M6 Toll motorway.

Staffordshire Ambulance Service said it would be meeting toll road bosses after the incident, at Weeford near Lichfield on Wednesday night.

An ambulance spokesman said such delays could put lives at risk.

The road's operators say the car was not 'clearly liveried' and no warning was given.

Bob Lee, for the ambulance service, said the driver, wearing a paramedic uniform, was only allowed through the toll after turning on the car's blue lights.

He was driving the Vauxhall estate from Cannock to Lichfield to provide emergency cover, when he was stopped at the exit of the M6 Toll and the booth operator refused to raise the barrier.

The white emergency response vehicle was marked with green chequered stripes with a blue light bar on top and blue lights on the grill.

It was displaying a large 'star of life' emblem on its bonnet and had the ambulance service's crown badge on the two front doors.

Mr Lee said all the above had been agreed with the operator of the M6 Toll, Midland Expressway Limited, as being sufficient for recognition as an ambulance vehicle.

Interesting facts

The Earth has at least two moons, Luna (or just 'the moon' to you and me) and Cruithne (pronounced 'crew-ith-ni') which takes over 700 years to complete its horseshoe orbit and is only three miles wide. Apparently, astronomers think there are more...

Eddison didn't invent the lightbulb.

He did, however invent the word 'Hello'. Apparently when the telephone was invented by Alexander Graham Bell (Scottish, not American as some seem to claim - I'm looking at you, Michael Moore) he decided there needed to be a greeting that could be used by someone when they answered. (Presumably he was thinking this in the time it took for someone to invent the all-important second telephone so he had someone to call).
Anyway, Bell came up with 'ahoy hoy' as the greeting but it never caught on (except with Monty Burns in The Simpsons).
Eddison came up with his alternative, presumably annoyed that a) he hadn't invented either the first telephone or indeed the all-important second telephone and b) that someone else came up with the lightbulb before he did.
His alternative was 'hello', a sligh alteration of 'hullo' which up until that point had been an expression of surprise as in 'hullo, what's going on here? Two ruffians are about to beat me senseless!'.

There's more where these came from! To stop me, send money to my Paypal account ;-)

November - thank god that's nearly over

You may skip this if you want. It's just a typical blog rant. Nothing to see here. Move along...

It's not been a good month. I had a huge row at work with my boss nearly resulting in me walking out, certainly resulting in me having to think about the 'next step'. And last week a row with someone else about something that was a) nothing to do with them and b) nothing to do with me (I was in the wrong place at the wrong time), and which just confirmed my thoughts about the first bloody row.
And here we are, several days before pay day and I'm so brassic (skint/penniless/poor) I've actually been eating breakfast cereal for the last week for meals. There's something not quite right about all of this!
Still, at least I'm losing weight.

Tomorrow I'm going to a meeting I organised for about thirty academics from four different institutions, including my own. The way this month is going, I predict disaster. The head of school, who I suspect thinks I'm a cleaner, will be there and I'm supposed to introduce her and sum up the day. Could be my chance to shine but any bets I bomb?
Craftily, I've put the last item on the day's agenda as 'colleagues are invited to adjourn to the bar to continue discussions' because what normally happens at these things is that everyone disappears the moment we get to 'coffee and summary of the day'. Teachers make the worst students - they never come back from lunch on time and slope off early. Hopefully the prospect of a pint and some peanuts will help. I'm gonna scrounge a Guinness from someone and steal a bowl of nibbles - I'm starving! All I've eaten the past week is a bag of muesli!

Oh and to cap it all the last three weekends have been marked by bizarre colds that have lasted one or two days - I really don't know what's going on there. This last one looked like it was going to be a stinker but has abated in the last few hours. It must be psychosomatic: it tends to coincide with me needing to get to work on the bloody book. Although if it were all in my head, why is there so much snot involved? Really - if there is a God up there, are colds her little joke? And why are they so much worse for men??! I'm a sneezer, and it hurts. I haven't yet perfected the girly art of the silent sneeze (how do they do that?)

I just turned on the radio and heard... Christmas carols. It's the first Sunday in Advent today. Not long ago I was complaining that Christmas comes earlier every year and here I am taken by surprise once more. I think I've probably missed the last posting day for New Zealand so that's a dog house of my own making.

Something that gets me about Christmas is the panic shopping. The shops are only shut for two days at the most (if that, nowadays) yet everybody stocks up on food and milk and bread like there's gonna be a nuclear war or something. Even I get sucked into it, planning to buy two tins of beans every day between now and Christmas Eve so there's something in the cupboard just in case. You watch, the fridge will be bursting with milk that'll eventually get thrown out (I normally get through two pints a week so why do I think I need five to last me two days?), there'll be tins of fruit galore (I don't like the stuff normally) and who knows what else. If I buy a bag of walnuts and some tangerines I'll know I need help.
I even found myself telling the cat (don't worry, I'm on the waiting list) that I'd need to stock up on cat biscuits - I mean, why? One box lasts all bloody week, just one box.

You know, I think I may be having the first online nervous breakdown here. History in the making...

Sustainability in Graphic Design

One of my students is undertaking a small research project looking at the issue of sustainability in graphic design - it's an interesting area, but I think the more he examines it the angrier he's getting.

He's posted a short questionnaire online to grab people's opinions of some of the issues, and knowledge of those issues, and I thought I'd post the link to his questionnaire so that if you have a few minutes (that's all it will take) you could give him the benefit of your thoughts (or ignorance - that's possibly half the point) on the matter.

Xbox Live

And talking of Xbox live, if you're on there and fancy adding me to your 'friends' list, my ID is 'roguebrainiac'. Don't laugh - it was one of those random IDs that the system came up with and I quite liked it...

Currently playing Halo 2 (although I can only play for half an hour before I feel seasick). I'm really bad at this sort of thing. I went on Xbvox live the other evening to be ritually humilated by some Swedish and German gamers who obviously have no idea about being 'sporting' and proceeded to shoot me silly.
It's the same with Project Gotham and Star Wars Battlefront, and don't get me started on Splinter Cell. The Xbox Live system is supposed to match you up with people of the same ability - either it doesn't work or the rest of the world has left me behind. I suspect the latter.

It takes me back to the days when I would usually be left till last when we were being picked for football and rugby at school. And cricket. Scarred for life and here I am putting myself through it on the world stage...

Qualifications

On the subject of qualifications, and design and education as professions, I wonder what people think qualifies someone to teach design?

I ask because I happen to know the number of design teachers with teaching qualifications in the UK is extremely low. The biggest qualification seems to be that you know someone who is already teaching, once worked for a famous client, or have stuck your work up on a gallery wall somewhere.

I've asked the question before but does being a 'good' designer make you a 'good' teacher? And who determines 'good' design anyway? I suspect a large number of design teachers have little understanding of teaching. (Witness the teacher I spoke with last year who said that students learn by being in the presence of greatness - a not untypical view).

Incidentally, this is true in all disciplines (even education!) - only a small percentage of university teachers in the UK have a teaching qualification, or have been observed teaching to see if they can actually do it. The perception is that there is nothing you can teach or learn about teaching and learning, that expertise is everything.
Maybe worse is the belief that once you're qualified, that's it. I would worry if I decided one day that I was 'complete' and that I had no way of improving as a teacher. I know I've still got a long way to go before I'm happy with my teaching ability, even though I've got a certificate that says I should be.

But imagine sending your child to a school where the teachers are unqualified beyond their interest in the subject. Or getting on a plane piloted by someone whose only claim to know what they are doing is 200 hours playing Flight Simulator on a PC at home, or being taught to drive by someone who has proven themselves a world leader on Project Gotham on Xbox live, but isn't actually qualified to drive for real.

You wouldn't do it. You'd object in the strongest terms. Yet that is what happens in universities up and down the country. There are fantastic teachers out there - lots of them, in fact, but outnumbered by the people who are good teachers but don't know why and don't care, and the mediocre teachers who could be great but can't be bothered to improve, and the bad teachers who blame the students and management when they moan constantly about falling standards, but don't for one minute think they might be at fault or in a position to make an improvement.

Sometimes I wonder how the academic community can survive with such closed minds.

Interference

The furore in the UK this week about Prince Charle's apparent anti-meritocratic views on education that 'admits no failure' and some of the remarks over on the Speak Up site about how (I wildly paraphrase) 'a teacher's job is to tell students how crap they are because that's the only way they'll learn that life is hard' made me think long and hard the past few days.

Criticisms of 'politically correct' teachers and teaching methods piss me off, as they tend to be made by people unqualified to make them except that a) they once went to school/university/whatever and b) they have kids or at least the physical ability to have them one day.

Compare that with the people they criticise, I mean what are a few professorships, PhDs, CertEds and years of experience of teaching in the way of expertise?

Might it not be the case that methods of teaching are arrived at through years of research and discussion rather than someone waking up one day and deciding suddenly that (to use the Speak Up example) we should mark students' work in purple because red is 'too negative'?
I actually think questioning the fundamental purpose of giving students feedback by focusing on the automatic use of red and its negative connotations is bold and creative, but to listen to some of the comments that (rare) context-missing article provoked you wonder why anyone should bother being creative when the world is generally so blinkered and unwilling to accept that they are not experts in everything.

Unlike me ;-)

But anyway - I made a throwaway comment to someone this week which ties in to this quite neatly. Design and teaching, I said, are the two professions where everyone thinks they know better than the experts. Design decisions are regularly criticised in the media ('this rebranding cost x million and all they did was change the typeface') as are educational ones ('you can do degrees in David Beckham now'). Both these comments display a complete lack of understanding about the processes and the facts. Only politics gets a worse press than design and education.

Oh, and estate agents.

Makes me wonder why I chose to get involved in both. If I ever feel the need to sell a house I'll get myself certified.

Talking of degrees in David Beckham studies I may be setting myself up for something of a fight after Christmas as, all being well, I am starting a ten week 'extension study' for second year students at Brighton which I've (wittily?) entitled 'Worst Course Ever: The Simpson's Family Guide to Cultural Studies'.

It should actually be quite thought-provoking and academically rigorous but I wouldn't be surprised if The Sun runs a story about how you can get a degree in The Simpsons and how low educational standards are falling.

That's okay, next year I'll do one on tabloid culture and see if they run a story about you being able to get a degree in themselves - will they criticise it or boast about it? Should keep them confused for weeks,

Hunting banned

Hunting with dogs has finally been banned in England. Personally I'm glad. I used to live in a rural area and remember hearing a really good pro-hunting argument, but it escapes me now. I can't see what's sporting about chasing a fox and ripping it to pieces, or see that it's a particularly efficient form of pest control.
The only worry is that the hedgerows that make the English countryside look the way it does may disappear as farmers don't have a reason to keep them anymore. We'll see.

The two arguments that really get to me are that it's traditional (so was burning witches - doesn't make it right) and that the ban infringes on human rights! Well so does the ban on me thumping idiots like this one, who left a comment on the BBC's news site:

BBC NEWS | Have Your Say | Hunting with dogs: Your views: "I am disgusted at this decision by the government, to once again infringe on the rights of the people of the countryside! It is a sad and sadistic government that puts the rights of an animal, before the rights of a human being! How long will it be before I am forbidden from walking on the carpet in my workplace, for fear of killing dust mites and other organisms, whose life now appears more important that my own personal well-being?"

What a dick head. If that's the most eloquent argument you can come up with maybe we sohould investigate a link between supporting hunting and loss of brain cells. (I know, I'm sinking to his level). I'm not a big fan of this fashion for news programmes to let people 'have their say'. It's more wool to pull over people's eyes - I wonder what Chomsky would have to say about it? But for entertainment value (and a dangerous increase in blood pressure) they're well worth a look.

But what really gets my goat is the assertion that this ban is some sort of 'prejudice' - please, I think there are far more important forms of prejudice to get all worked up about. If they put half the energy they put into this into tackling race hate, or even the vast gulf between rich and poor in their own back yard, the world would be a much better place.

The claim that it will ruin the economy of the countryside? I don't buy it - whole regions of the UK were decimated by the decline of manufacturing and mining in the 1980s, so I think this pales into insignificance next to that.

They also claim that thousands of dogs will have to be put down, and that this is more cruel than hunting foxes. Well let me make a few points: why will they have to be put down? When were 'country folk' ever sentimental about 'working dogs'? And isn't that just part and parcel of breeding vicious killers for your own entertainment? Stop breeding the bloody things and then you won't need to put them down.

And the threat of mass civil unrest makes me sick. How would these fools feel if the rest of us decided to flout the law against breaking into their houses because we thought it infringed our civil liberties? This policy was in the last two Labour manifestos, and both the last two general elections resulted in the biggest majorities since the second world war (in fact, ever, if memory serves.) My advice is get over it - you've known about it for over a decade, you've marched, you've had your say. Throwing missiles at ministers, dumping dead cows and horses in Brighton city centre, threatening to break the law - these are not civilised actions and only throw your barbaric practices into even greater relief.

At the end of the day, these people are not being banned from riding horses as fast as they want over fields, nor from blowing horns and having parties. But they are being banned from ripping mammals to shreds for the fun of it.

Quite why it took us so long, I really don't know.

What do girls know?

I'm not a messy person, but I'm not the tidiest either. I am one of those people that doesn't put books back but will leave them open at pages, or I'll see a book on a shelf and think "I might want to read that soon" so I'll take it down and add it to a pile. I am organised, if piles are a recognised filing system. (I worked out today I've lived alone for 17 years - longer than I lived at home - so I think I've done well to survive this long).

Anyway, today, faced with another brick wall of writer's block I finally decided I had to tidy up, convinced as I was that it was the mess that was preventing me from working.
And I discovered something amazing.

All these years, girlfriends and female acquaintances have insisted to me that it would "only take five minutes" to tidy up and I've dismissed them usually with a "this isn't messy, it's just organised chaos and if you loved me you'd put up with it" argument.

But you know what? Turns out they were right. It does only take five minutes. Who'd have thought it?

Which reminds me - I found this the other day, made me titter.

NEW EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN!!!
ALL ARE WELCOME
OPEN TO MEN ONLY
Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants sign up early and get a discount on registration
The course covers two days, and topics covered in this course include:

DAY ONE
HOW TO FILL ICE CUBE TRAYS
Step by step guide with slide presentation

TOILET ROLLS- DO THEY GROW ON THE HOLDERS?
Roundtable discussion

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN LAUNDRY BASKET & FLOOR
Practising with hamper (Pictures and graphics)

DISHES & SILVERWARE; DO THEY LEVITATE/FLY TO KITCHEN SINK OR DISHWASHER BY THEMSELVES?
Debate among a panel of experts.

LOSS OF VIRILITY
Losing the remote control to your significant other - Help line and support groups

LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS
Starting with looking in the right place instead of turning the house upside down while screaming - Open forum

DAY TWO
EMPTY MILK CARTONS; DO THEY BELONG IN THE FRIDGE OR THE BIN?
Group discussion and role play

HEALTH WATCH; BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH
PowerPoint presentation

REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST
Real life testimonial from the one man who did

IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY AS SHE PARALLEL PARKS?
Driving simulation

HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION
Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques

REMEMBERING IMPORTANT DATES & PHONING WHEN YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE
Bring your calendar or PDA to class

GETTING OVER IT; LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH BEING WRONG ALL THE TIME
Individual counsellors available

Cool piece of software alert

If you're a Mac user, check out Delicious Library. If you're not a Mac user, check it out anyway - software that looks this good is one of the reasons we love our Macs ;-)

It's a book, CD, DVD and game library that downloads covers from Amazon and displays your collection as though its on a shelf.



I've been using Readerware for a while and scanned my extensive collection in a while back using a bar code reader (more for insurance purposes than anything else - 1000 books, 600 CDs, a lot to replace if the worst happens).
I like Readerware and recommend it, but it's a bit slow and clunky-looking. Delicious Library is also a bit slow but it looks gorgeous. I've had trouble importing CDs and DVDs but I've reported the issue to the programmers. All my books apart from a dozen were read perfectly from Amazon and I have a rather impressive collection appearing on screen. And books I've bought recently? Well check out the iSight barcode scanning facility - just wave the book in front of the camera and it grabs the barcode, goes to Amazon and gets the details and the cover art, then plonks it in your collection. Cool.

Well worth a look.

A lovely brew

Just a bit of nonsense. I was talking about branding today and I reckon I'm only loyal to two brands: Apple Computers and Yorkshire Tea. Everything else is a blur. I don't know what brand of toothpaste I have, or shower gel or whatever.
Although trying (with some success) to go organic I now use Ecover washing-up liquid and detergent so maybe that's another one to add to the list.

Anyway. I've been drinking LOTS of tea recently, I can't seem to get enough. I was wondering if Yorkshire Tea would be something I'd have to give up if I ever move to America (not that it's on the cards or anything) and what do you know, you can buy it over there.

So as an early Thanksgiving gift to the 95% of my readers who are American, and at risk of bringing up that whole Boston Tea Party nonsense again, here's a link to a little taste of heaven. It's not cheap but it's great. You need to brew it for a couple of minutes though with a good mashing you can get a decent cup made in the time it takes for the Law and Order titles to run.

Go to this site to get your fix. I promise you won't regret it.

Let me know what you think...

2004 U.S. Election controversies and irregularities

Mmmm...

2004 U.S. Election controversies and irregularities: "One website discusses Gahanna, Franklin Co. Ohio. The vote reported by the county in Gahanna 1-B was 4258 Bush, 260 Kerry, and the total votes cast in Gahanna overall were 20,736. However:


Gahanna has some 20,000 people elegible to vote and the reported turnout was around 70%. On a casual reckoning approximately 14,000 people voted, and yet nearly 21,000 votes were reported by voting machines.

4258 Republican votes were electronically reported for Bush in Gahanna 1-B. But there were only 638 votes cast in the precinct. Furthermore the 3893 extra individuals who are said to have queued to vote for Bush, and were therefore presumably Republican, did not appear to vote on any other matter bar the Presidency. (These other matters included the Senate race, County Commissioner, several County and State officials, and the imfamous Gay Unions vote, issues of great importance in the election)

Book progress and stuff

Work on the book has been sporadic recently. I've found that I've been able to discuss some of its key concepts with a lot of my students recently but I sometimes feel like I'm just plugging it rather than teaching...

It never ceases to amaze me how articulate these people are, but how they seem to be convinced they know nothing. I wonder how much more they would get out of things if they were challenged more often to think intellectually rather than purely visually? What would happen, do you think, to their visual work?
Critics at my last place of work were definite: the visual would suffer.

Bullshit.

The problem is we focus too much on the finished article - it has to look glossy and 'professional'. I remember one of my students in my first year of teaching. He was perhaps one of the most original thinkers I'd ever met, able to sketch down an idea off the top of his head that immediately answered the problem. He would have made a great advertising creative.

But his finishing skills were crap. On one occasion I saw him struggling to make an idea 'look good' in Illustrator so I sat down and showed him how it would be done. He sat and watched as I took his idea and made it 'look good' while trying to point out that the two sets of skills were often separate in the real world - the artworker (the role I was playing) is usually not the same person who comes up with the rough ideas. But I think he missed that, focussing purely on how I did what I did, the speed at which I did it, and the fact that he could 'never be as good'. I saw a lot of him in me - I'm an ideas man, good at copywriting and coming up with creative solutions off the top of my head. I'm also a good art director, but just not good at the bit in between (the actual 'design', I suppose)

It wasn't his fault that he had this self-defeating view - the education system expected him to be a jack of all trades, particularly specilised in the finishing-off area. Consequently he was always labelled as being poor. He needed to be on a course that deliberately never took students to the finished artwork stage, but I'm not sure one exists. I toyed with developing one but was quickly shouted down by my 'it's all about the visual' colleagues.
The end result is his confidence was knocked and he was unfairly dismissed by teachers who think graphic design is about sticking things on walls and cooing over them. Idiots. What a stupid bloody system.

Last I heard this student was a runner in an ad agency - halfway there; he should have been running the place.

Anyway, back to the book. I wrote about 3,000 words yesterday which is most of a chapter. When I went to bed I felt pleased with myself but this morning they don't read so well. I'm supposed to be writing about design and identity but I've written loads on consumption - important to cover but maybe not the main focus here. I need to avoid getting depressed about it as that'll only lead to procrastination. I may even (shock horror) tidy up later to avoid writing. If things get desperate there's always the ironing...

Design is an intellectual process

I've been thinking a lot about 'creativity' a lot recently, and why the design world defines it differently from everyone else, much to our own detriment and the eternal frustration and confusion of students.

This came home to me this week talking to some graphic design students from an unnamed institution about a 'live brief' they had undertaken for a local broadcaster which, by the sound of things left nobody (clients or students) any the wiser and probably left students a lot more cynical about the industry. I'm not criticising my colleagues, rather the system we operate nationally (maybe internationally?) whereby 'real' clients come in - possibly looking for cheap design - poorly brief a hundred students who then find it impossible to get to grips with what's needed and find any ideas they have dismissed as 'unoriginal' (Hello? Have you seen what real world graphic design is like?) and get inconsistent advice from different teachers. Then it becomes a beauty contest with potentially good ideas dismissed because they are sketches (or even just thoughts), and there's no ability to introduce an idea before it is revealed.

Finally the clients go away with far too many permutations when they really only needed one or two. But at least they got to act all powerful - never, ever put a client in a position where you ask them if they like something because they will always say 'no'. Tell them why they'll like the design first, make them feel ignorant if they can't 'get it' and then show them.

Not very realistic at all, really, this way of doing things - and I struggle to see the educational value.

I wrote a blog entry last night on the subject of creativity but I'm thinking of delaying posting it as I want to read a bit more on the subject to see if I'm just repeating what others have said. But maybe I will post it as a 'thinking out loud' exercise.

In the meantime, here's Erik Spiekermann:

Design is an intellectual process: Design is an intellectual process

My short answer to a frequent question:
“How do you define what you do?”

Design is first and foremost an intellectual process. Contrary to popular belief, designers are not artists. They employ artistic methods to visualize thinking and process, but, unlike artists, they work to solve a client’s problem, not present their own view of the world. If a design project, however, is to be considered successful – and that would be the true measure of quality – it will not only solve the problem at hand, but also add an aesthetic dimension beyond the pragmatic issues.

I consider design not to be a series of “creative” one-offs, but an integrated process, from planning the appropriate communications strategy to designing functional and beautiful objects as well as – for example – implementing electronic stationery on clients' systems.

What clients say and what designers hear are too often very different things. Design is a powerful tool to help clarify the problem. It is only when a common understanding has been established between client and designer that effective results can be achieved.

Design quality needs an integrated approach: look more closely than expected, ask many questions, think laterally, get involved in things you shouldn’t, do more than you are supposed to and have fun doing it. Problem solving is one thing, aesthetic pleasure another. Combine the two, make the engineer sketch like an artist and make the artist analyze like an engineer, and you are half-way there.

Star Wars Episode 3 Trailer

It's here...

Better USA election map

I love how design can be used to make quite complex matters easy to understand at a glance.

This map (a bigger and clearer version is over at the Princeton site) combines the idea of the two I mentioned earlier. It's interesting that there seem to be even clearer patterns: the Democrat vote isn't as concentrated as it appeared before - there's a definite vertical strip in the mid west, but nowhere near as deep red as the states down the centre, It's less of a whitewash than the earlier district map suggested and really highlights how close the final result was.

Dancing on platforms? Sooo 1970s

Surreal. But that's London for you...

iPod-crazed youths invade London station | The Register : "It's 6:45 pm on a drizzly Wednesday evening at Waterloo Station. The main concourse is crowded more than usual due to train delays. Anxious faces stare at blue screens hoping for their cue to sprint to a platform in the hope of a seat. The middle aged lady with handbag in one hand and mobile phone in the other looks down for a second and stares in bemusement at two young ladies who begin dancing to the sound of their personal stereos. She shakes herself to check her senses are not playing tricks as a Conga line streams past behind her with 20 or 30 people listening to their own personal stereos. Other commuters look on dumbfounded.

Welcome to the world of Mobile Clubbing. Simply, mobile clubbing is turning up at a pre-arranged public place on mass where you begin to dance to the sound of your own personal stereo. It is unclear where the concept of Mobile Clubbing originates but one thing is clear and that in the world of spontaneous mass public gatherings, it has replaced Flash Mobbing. Throughout the UK, events are organised on the Internet, informally among groups of friends and the word passes via chat rooms and news forums. But what is the point of meeting on mass and dancing to the sound of your own personal stereo?

'The point is that there is no point, we do it for fun, we do it because we can.' explains Ben Cummins, a musical artist who with his friend Emma Davis organised this and other Mobile Clubbing events in the UK.

Emma (28) wants to dispel the myth that this is about trendy metropolitan London twenty-somethings. 'We have had families turning up at events. We have had older people and we have had suits but everyone has fun and there is no trouble.' she explained.

The people who attend these events are diverse for sure but they are not sad, they have friends and are mainly intelligent and articulate people.

I bumped (literally) into Beth Parker, a trendy metropolitan twentysomething from West London, who told me: 'I enjoy dancing and had fun at a previous event at Liverpool Street Station.' She's listening to James Zabiela & Sasha's Breakbeat. She floats off with the rhythm, unfazed by the attention from the media and from frowning commuters.

I meet a pair of middle aged ladies who would not have been out of place on Strictly Come Dancing. Mary from Norwood and Penny, originally from Hong Kong but now of Streatham Hill met at a dance class. They have been dancing partners ever since and told me about their repertoire of Argentinean Tango, Charleston and Samba dancing. Mary whisks me away and before I know it she is leading me in a Tango. Aware of my rapidly increasing heart rate, I rapidly disengage and thank the two ladies for their time.

'We need more men,' she declares.

Editor's note: I'm on my way, ladies!

All around the main concourse there is a polychromatic array of multicultural mixed sex, mixed aged groups doing their own thing. The common denominator seems to be a sense of fun. Many of the stranded travellers are snapping pictures with their mobile camera phones, some even get into the spirit and join in. The majority look on in bewilderment.

The station staff and the police, who have clearly been tipped off, look on. They are prepared for the worst case scenario but the event passes without incident and with the minimum inconvenience to commuters. In the corner I see the British Transport Police interviewing Ben and Emma but even they have to admit that while there was a potential public safety issue, they could not fault the conduct of the hundred or so participants.

Ben was happy with the result.

'Everyone had a good time and there has been no trouble.' he said.

Asked about the next event Ben explains: 'It will just happen, we don't do this to seek publicity, the whole point is that anyone can come along and have fun.'

Check out http://www.mobile-clubbing.com for future events.

Democracy gives us the governments we deserve

Today's UK Daily Mirror (not my usual paper of choice):



Sums up the feeling over this side of the pond, really.

Incidentally, here's a map of the USA based on each state's vote - the colour reflects the share each party got rather than who won:



(Map by Jeff Culver)

And here's one that shows each district based on who won it.



(From USA Today)

I'm guessing the blue areas are largely urban? It's the only way you can explain the purpleness of the fisrt map, but the apparent redness of the second...

Can I just say - either the USA is conveniently laid out, or Americans like straight lines - you should see constituencies and electoral wards over here in the UK. Sometimes they double back on themselves so much you have to miss single houses out of a canvas because it is in one ward or constituency but its neighbours are in another. (Well I exaggerate, but not much!) Michigan's a bit odd though. Who thought that one up? What's so bad about the bit to the north of Wisconsin that the people there didn't want it?

Guardian Unlimited | US elections 2004 | The last post

We had an interesting discussion about globalization and cultural homogenization today (which also included a brief moment of self-doubt as I tried to figure out if those words were spelt with 's' rather than 'z' so go figure). Students (from all nations) were very anti-American but, worryingly, seemed to equate government and people as the same thing - that's never happened before and is somewhat telling.

At one point I stopped the discussion to say that, for all the complaints about America's apparent aim to homogenise/ize us, we seemed to be doing exactly the same by assuming someone from Texas was the same as someone from New York.
It seems few people stop to consider the USA is 50 states (i.e. countries) or if I remember correctly 46 states and four commonwealths.

Anyway... The Guardian's Operation Clark County project continues to gaain attention (follow the link to their follow up article from today's edition). I'd be interested to know if it's been widely reported in the USA and how it's been seen. The Guardian's G2 section, in which this started, is often quite ironic and the whole thing was slightly tongue in cheek. Rather than try to persuade people to vote for Kerry they were, like me, more concerned that people a) voted and b) realised that what happens there affects everyone around the world. That seems to have been lost on some people.

Reading some of the responses makes you glad there's an Atlantic ocean between us but the problem is, every American I've ever had dealings with whether in person or via email - and I've 'met' lots recently - has been a pleasure to talk to (except one, someone working in an internet store who got my order one Saturday and sent me a bizzarre email telling me he was going to ignore it because it was Independence Day and... well, lots of anti-British invective followed. Irony is, it was July 2nd and even I know that's not Independence Day. I saw the film, and I know these things ;-)

Still, we have weirdos aplenty over here but thankfully few of them know how to write, never mind access the internet so you're pretty much safe from them.

Guardian Unlimited | US elections 2004 | The last post: "Fox-viewing America was never going to embrace our modest sortie into US politics and we knew full well that any individual voter might take exception to the idea of a foreigner writing to offer some advice on how they should vote - our website explicitly urged participants to 'imagine how you would feel if you received a letter from an American urging you to vote for Tony Blair ... or Michael Howard.' But you couldn't fail to be a little shocked by the volume and pitch of the invective directed our way. Most of it was coordinated by a handful of resourceful bloggers - the ringleader of whom is fittingly published on a site called 'spleenville' - and much of it was eye-wateringly unpleasant. 'I hope your earholes turn to arseholes and shit on your shoulders,' was one, more repeatable example of the scatalogical genre. Another memorable mail asked:

'How secure is your building that contains all you morons???

Do you have enough security??

ARE YOU SURE ??? Are you VERY sure ??'

Interestingly, one of the recurrent themes running through the onslaught was an ardent admiration for Tony Blair from the kind of people who might feel slightly out of place in even the biggest of New Labour big tents. Another was a curious obsession with the state of British dentistry: 'MAY YOU HAVE TO HAVE A TOOTH CAPPED. I UNDERSTAND IT TAKES AT LEAST 18 MONTHS FOR YOUR GREAT MEDICAL SERVICES TO GET AROUND TO YOU.' At times, it felt as though whole swathes of America had suffered an epidemic of Tourette syndrome.

So far, so bad. The email onslaught was pretty unpleasant and inconvenient for the 53 Guardian colleagues whose addresses were targeted by the rightwing spammers - several of us received more than 700 mails - but by and large they were the sort of missives that left you feeling relieved you were not on the same side of the argument (indeed, any argument) as the sender. The same could be said of the news this week that Rush Limbaugh had devoted virtually all of one of his three-hour shows to our Clark County project."

Dear Limey Assholes

Guardian Unlimited | US elections 2004 | Reaction from the US to the Guardian's Clark County project: "Have you not noticed that Americans don't give two shits what Europeans think of us? Each email someone gets from some arrogant Brit telling us why to NOT vote for George Bush is going to backfire, you stupid, yellow-toothed pansies ... I don't give a rat's ass if our election is going to have an effect on your worthless little life. I really don't. If you want to have a meaningful election in your crappy little island full of shitty food and yellow teeth, then maybe you should try not to sell your sovereignty out to Brussels and Berlin, dipshit. Oh, yeah - and brush your goddamned teeth, you filthy animals.
Wading River, NY"

Last week the Guardian in the UK offered readers the opportunity to get hold of the address of a voter in Clark County, Ohio and write to them encouraging them to vote in the upcoming election.

Here's the article, and here are some of the responses from America...

Well I've said it before and I'll say it again. When both candidates claim the election is for the leader of the free world (I heard Kerry say it last week in Maine - I was watching the whole thing here in the UK! - and I know Bush has said it several times) then I think it's reasonable the rest of the free world has a say.

My preference is for Kerry, but really I just want a decisive result either way. So please, just vote... :-)

New Doctor Who logo revealed - oh dear

This will only make sense to those of you who care, but the BBC finally revealed the new logo for the relaunch of Doctor Who next year. Apparently about five people worked on this.



What can I say? I know the series is about time travel but this is a bit 1987 isn't it? How it'll work on books, DVDs, magazines and (sniff) badges and t-shirts I don't know. Five minutes with Photoshop and a lens flare filter gone haywire.

There's a bigger version available. Maybe it'll grow on me but I find it difficult to read and a bit too 'slick'. Maybe it's a still from the title sequence and the words sit on their own in other uses?

Maybe I shouldn't care... but I do.

Attack of the 60ft students!

Something is really worrying me about my new first year students. They are all much, much taller than me. I am 'average' height but the other day I got them all to stand up for a little experiement and I felt really, really insignificant. The year above them are about normal, and the current third years are all at eye level with me except for one or two.

So what's going on? I'm wondering if the BSE scare a few years ago means this lot have all been fed on US beef complete with growth hormones, or is it because the 'buy this soap powder get free art materials for your school' promotions started around about the time this lot started getting interested in art at school? In which case they were obviously exposed to some sort of chemical onslaught that really needs investigating.

Nice group, though. Haven't had anything thrown at me yet and they laugh at some of my jokes, so it looks good...

In Praise of dumbing Down

For the past few years the phrase ‘dumbing down’ has been applied liberally to just about every area of life. It is an insult, a quick and cheap way of shutting someone up by claiming they are oversimplifying something or don’t know what they’re talking about.

I’ve never been keen on the phrase myself – I think people who use it are lazy; dumbing down, in fact.
A regular columnist for The Times Higher Educational Supplement, Frank furedi, a professor of sociology, uses the term freely and implies it even more in his increasingly nonsensical articles and, just out, his latest book: Where Have All the Intellectuals Gone?: Confronting 21st Century Philistinism.

Furedi, and many like him, bemoan the rise of a world that pretends anyone can have access to knowledge and understanding. He unashamedly demands that universities be elitest, that the children of the working classes be left to be workers while people like him get on and think seriously all day about how best to increase the intellectual inequalities in society.

This whole dumbing down thing preoccupies me a lot at the moment. Since I started teaching I’ve been trying to find ways of taking subjects that traditionally turn people off and making them interesting. Unlike Mr Furedi I don’t think finding something uninteresting is the fault of the student, but of the subject and its champions. There is no subject in the world so complicated that it can’t be explained in plain English. It doesn’t stop it being complex to understand fully, but why should it be impossible to understand at all?

In the past few weeks I’ve been writing a book (due out next summer) about visual communication and I’ve been worrying a lot about it. The reason is that the book offers an opportunity for me to put something concrete on my CV under ‘publications’, something all academics need if they are to progress to the holy grail of a full-time post rather than, as I do at the moment, have to keep at least three or four jobs on the go just to make ends meet (which they don’t, incidentally). So on the one hand I have an audience in mind: my academic peers and masters. I need to produce a book that will help me gain entry into the ivory towers, so I need to make sure it is full of footnotes, brown-nosed cross references to the people who count, and essentially written in an impenetrable manner. The rule of thumb is that readability is inversely proportional to academic worth.

But my real audience is somewhat different: the book is aimed at first year undergraduates on practice-based design courses who traditionally view ‘theory’ as something to run away from as quickly as possible. Not because, as I say, the concepts are scary or impossible for them to follow, but generally because they are taught in such a way as to say ‘if you don’t understand this you’re thick’.

Let me tell you something. I’m a fan of Baudrillard, I find his theories bold and imaginative and not much different from my own ideas about the way the world works; but the man can’t write. I was reading some of his stuff last weekend and found myself having to re-read sentences several times. No wonder there’s such a market for ‘Baudrillard made easy’ books – and I admit to using them. If he could write like Douglas Adams we'd be living in a far, far better world.

So I’ve written this book in a way that those who’ve read drafts have said is clear and easy to understand. So I should be pleased about that, yes?

No. I’m actually worried about it because I know I’m effectively shooting my academic career not so much in the foot as the head – it’s terminal. The anti-dumbing down brigade is the equivalent of the intellectual mafia, shouting so loudly that they are in effect academic bullies determined to preserve ‘standards’ (rather than improve them) not by advancing their subjects but by making them impenetrable to all but the pre-vetted elite. That entry to this elite is determined by cultural and financial capital makes it even worse – how dare the self-taught son of a postman who never went to proper university dare publish a book that makes communication theory, cultural theory and even semiotics 'easy to understand'?

I find the ‘dumbing down’ brigade reprehensible. The other day I gave a lecture on communication theory to nearly 80 first year students and did it in my usual way. I introduced Shannon and Weaver’s process model by running a game of Chinese Whispers, and prefaced semiotics by asking a student to draw things on the whiteboard while the rest shouted answers out Pictionary-style.

I suspect 80 students left with at least some understanding of basic semiotics and communication theory. Most will have left with a very good understanding and an enthusiasm for the subject that will lead them to read more on it and discuss it with their friends. But the ‘dumbing down’ brigade would have been turning in their graves if they had been dead. I really should have used a traditional lecture with slides, read from a paper and followed up with a pile of reading and an essay. Out of the 80 students I bet not one would have left with enthusiasm for anything except a stiff drink.

I have sat in lectures by leading authorities in their subject that have resulted in confusion and a determination never to darken that subject’s door again – and I mean by me, not by students. People with postgraduate qualifications prepare to talk to people with nothing more than an A-level (at best) without making any concessions. I went to one lecture on subcultures – an interesting topic that should really engage the fashion students in the audience, you’d think – that in the first sentence mentioned hegemony but never once explained what it was. When I suggested to a colleague that this was a problem I was told in no uncertain terms that this was ‘dumbing down’ and that if students don’t know something they should go off and find out. Ah, the GOFO teaching technique (or FOFO as I prefer to call it).

But this doesn’t help me. I want my book to be a CV enhancer and career resuscitator, not my suicide note.

Then one morning, it struck me. I was in the shower, where all the best ideas come, going over the book’s central argument (that all design is political but whether we consent to its commissioner’s worldview, negotiate our own response or engage in conflict is our decision) I realised that most of chapter one is given over to the idea that communication theory tells us the best way to communicate something complex is to make it easy to understand. My approach to writing the book is confirmed by the very subject matter, and it’s an argument that has been used not just by communications and cultural theorists but by sociologists like my old friend Mr Frank Furedi. Arguing against speaking plainly is a way of defending an ideological process whereby those who can talk the talk can impose their views on everyone else not because the views are right but because the situation keeps them where they are. The barbarians are at the gate, and people like me who advocate getting people interested in how the bloody locks work are a threat to their position.

If ‘dumbing down’ is a phrase that’s not going to go away then let’s change its meaning. If dumbing down helps people who otherwise were literally, but not intellectually, ignorant to understand the way the world works then let’s have more of it. And if I hear a critic describe my book as dumbing down I’ll take it as a compliment.

Christmas is coming...

I've just got back from one of those night-time trips to the local Co-Op for cat food that also resulted in me now sitting here eating a family pack of Haribo Star Mix, evil little buggers that lie just on the wrong side of moreishness (is that a real word?)
What really irritated me about the visit was I stumbled on the store workers stacking a whole wall's-worth of Christmas confectionary and other stuff: selection boxes, sweet mince meat and advent calendars.
I had spotted the first little bits and bobs in another supermarket in late August but let it go because it wasn't much, but this is the first overt Christmas theming I've seen this year and, quite frankly, I'm disgusted. Not so much because of the indecent haste with which summer has been consigned to the past, nor the clash of pagan Hallowe'en masks and Christian festival (since when did the British celebrate Hallowe'en anyway?).
No, what really pisses me off about this is that I'm thirty-four in three weeks' time and my "Christmas gets earlier every year" mental tirade makes me feel really, really old.
Thirty years ago I would have started aching for Christmas round about now (after my birthday of course) and it would have seemed an age before it arrived, all the worse for the shops, the TV ads, the smell of bonfires on November 5th that seem to linger right through to the end of December, and the itch of glitter used in school to make cards and decorations but that somehow gets everywhere except on the paper and the glue.
But now I think "Bugger. I'm old"

I think I'm actually dreading this one because next year I reach the average age for marriage in this country, as well as the age where I become a member of various "at risk" groups - heart attack, stroke (these sweets are helping me on the way), several different types of cancer that - god fordbid I should offend here - see far more men off than breast cancer does women but go realtively ignored, and suicide. Presumably it's all the cheery news about being "at risk" that leads to suicide if the others don't get you.

So next year beckons already, thanks to the confectionary industry, and with it the prospect of premature death due to some ailment or by my own hand, or marriage. It's not much to look forward to is it?

Sad flamingo tries to hatch stone

I'm quite busy at the moment, working on two interesting projects (of which, details soon!) and getting into the swing of the new academic year - quite a lot of really fascinating ideas coming out of this year's dissertation students so it might be an interesting term.

But in lieu of a more substantive post on design or education, or Florida's third world election system, I thought I'd post this article as it made me go ahhhh... There's a lesson for us all here - not sure what it is yet, but a lesson to be sure.

BBC NEWS | England | Gloucestershire | Sad flamingo tries to hatch stone: "Sad flamingo tries to hatch stone

A lonely and confused male flamingo has caused a flap at a nature reserve in Gloucestershire.

Andy, an Andean flamingo, spent a fortnight trying to incubate a pebble which he has mistaken for an egg.

Wardens at the Wildfowl and Wetlands Trust in Slimbridge first thought the 40-year-old bird had injured himself.

Nigel Jarrett, a bird nesting expert, said: 'The birds are very attentive and do make excellent fathers, but this is above and beyond the call of duty.'

Mr Jarrett eventually replaced the pebble with a wooden replica of a flamingo egg.

Two weeks on, Andy is still there, leaving the 'egg' for only an hour a day when he goes to feed.

Mr Jarrett said: 'We let Andy sit on the replica in case a female flamingo for some reason rejected her own egg.

'We could have then placed the rejected egg under Andy for him to incubate as an alternative parent.'

Breeding season

Mr Jarrett believes Andy's broodiness is down to his body being full of hormones at the end of the breeding season.

'He doesn't seem to have a mate. It's possible that he did have a partner and for some reason their egg didn't survive as they can be snatched by gulls and crows.

'His mate may have left after the egg disappeared, but Andy may still not have noticed and carried on, thinking the pebble was a prospective chick.'"

Mess

I honestly don't know where mess comes from. I tidied up last week before going away for three days leaving the house to Pickle and the cat sitter. I got back on the Friday night to see the place as tidy as I'd left it, and smelling of vanilla air freshener.

The next morning I went to London to meet an old student (very drunken afternoon/evening as it turned out) and spent most of Sunday sitting very, very still indeed.

Monday I was up at 4.45am as I had to go to Leicester and wasn't back until 8pm. Went straight to bed after watching Law and Order.

Tuesday I went into work and then sat at the computer all night trying to get my new Palm to work. Wednesday I spent at home trying to write a sample chapter of my new book and then went to the gym, followed by a rare early night.

Now here I am writing this surrounded by old newspapers I don't remember buying, a pile of washing up (did I eat this week?), a fetid bathroom (personally i am clean, but when i shower it obviously just gets sprayed over the walls rather than going down the drain) and a bedroom piled high with dirty washing and a desk covered in paper, books and CDs (even though I don't play CDs anymore, as I use iTunes streaming wirelessly to my stereo).

Where does it come from? I haven't done anything this week!

Maybe it's a girl thing? The messier the flat the more likely I am to get a surprise visitor who will have a go at me about the mess only for me to protest that it was tidy yesterday and it's not normally like this, honest.

iTunes now playing: Summa from the album Summa by Part, Arvo

Buzz off...

This movie apparently won first prize in the Philips Digital Art Festival. It's rather clever - move your mouse around the image, then rest it on the guy's nose.

I am better than your kids.

It's been a long week and it's only Tuesday. No wonder I found myself laughing at this. I shouldn't, but I did - take a look for yourself at I am better than your kids.

If you work in an office with lots of people, chances are that you work with a person who hangs pictures up that their kids have drawn. The pictures are always of some stupid flower or a tree with wheels. These pictures suck; I could draw pictures much better. In fact, I can spell, do math and run faster than your kids. So being that my skills are obviously superior to those of children, I've taken the liberty to judge art work done by other kids on the internet. I'll be assigning a grade A through F for each piece

Consumer choice redefined

MSN Entertainment - Music: "How can I get MSN Music downloads to play on my iPod?

Unfortunately Apple refuses to support the popular Windows Media format on the iPod, choosing to only support their own proprietary DRM format. If you are an iPod owner and are unhappy about this, please send feedback to Apple and ask them to change their policy and interoperate with other music services.


There are more than 70 portable audio devices that support MSN Music today, and we hope that someday Apple decides to join with the industry and support consumer choice."

Ah. That'll be the 70% of consumers who have chosen to buy iPods then? (I was on a long train journey today and it seemed every other person was listening to an iPod).

The irony is, Microsoft's new music download service (like Real's, who are also pushing Apple to 'support customer choice) doesn't work unless you use the latest version of Windows. Could I sue, as a Mac user? I wonder...

Apple's iPod and iTunes work on Macs and Windows, and supports MP3, WAV, AIFF, MP4/AAC as well as the DRM-enabled AAC files from the iTunes Music Store. So much for consumer choice. MS and Real appear to be attempting to create a myth of incompatability. Sadly, so many people blindly use their products as they're automatically downloaded and installed, they might just win this one.

US-Election.org: The world's voice, the world's vote

On the radio this morning I heard the report of Bush's acceptance speech and mention of him being re-elected as "leader of the free world". trouble is, only a tiny proportion of that "free world" is actually allowed to vote in the election (60 days and counting).
In my book, that's not democracy - that's a dictatorship. Perhaps it's time for truly universal suffrage and the extension of voting rights in this election to everyone with a vested interest.

Anyone who believes the President of the USA is the leader of the free world has a duty to vote on behalf of the free world. Looking at US-Election.org: The world's voice, the world's vote the free world want's Kerry by 71% to 10%. If Bush really believes in the God-given democratic system (and oh boy did I nearly throw up at that point), he should be praying in earnest tonight.

The Presidential election in the United States has an impact on people in countries throughout the world, yet only US citizens are permitted to vote in that election. US-election.org is a Web site designed to permit people throughout the world to cast a ballot in the US election.   To learn more about the people that built this site, click on About Us at the bottom of the page.

The ballot will not count, at least in the sense that it will not help determine the outcome of the US election. But it will make it possible for you to express your viewpoint and have your voice added to those of others around the world. The results of your vote and those of all other votes will be shown,  country by country, on this site.